Embracing the DINK Lifestyle: Navigating Finances and Choices

For years, I’ve known I was a DINK (dual income, no kids). But recently, I learned that I’m actually a part of the DINKWAD community. Not sure what a DINKWAD is? It’s short for Dual Income, No Kids, with a Dog (DINKWAD). When I posted a YouTube short about being a DINKWAD, it unsurprisingly came with a side of trolls! Not only will I cover why being a proud member of the childfree community tends to ruffle some feathers, but I’ll also talk about special financial considerations if you’re a DINK, DINKWAD, SINK, or another type of member of the childfree community.

If you’re a part of the childfree movement and think it’s growing, it’s not in your head. There’s been a 7% increase in childfree adults between 2018 and 2021, with 44% of non-parents saying they likely won’t have children in the future. There could be a number of reasons for this, from environmental concerns to the cost of living, but I also think it’s important to note that a lot of childfree folks simply responded with “I don’t want to have kids,” as the biggest factor in why they don’t have children.

Sh*t People Say To Childfree Adults

When I've shared my choice not to have children, I've encountered various responses, ranging from well-intentioned and couched in compliments to outright criticism and judgments. I’ve heard everything from “You’ll change your mind” to “Your kids would be so cute!” to “Who will take care of you when you're older?” As I’ve gotten older, it’s so much easier to respond to these with brush-offs, but these types of comments would get to me when I was younger.

The “you’ll change your mind” comment is easy to respond to. My go-to response is, “I’d much rather change my mind about wishing I’d had kids than having a child only to change my mind and not want a kid.” Regarding comments about looks or legacy, apps can face-mash if I’m curious about possible ways a child might look. When it comes to “concerns” over my legacy, thankfully, I don’t live in a reality where I’m a part of a royal monarchy, so my legacy won’t be passed down via a bloodline. And when it comes to who will take care of me, having children doesn’t guarantee they’ll care for me in old age. A part of my financial plan includes planning for my aging and elder care.

Dual Income No Kids: Living Outside the American Dream

Talking about my decision not to have kids tends to rub some people the wrong way. I think it's because my lifestyle challenges the traditional American Dream – you know, the one with the white picket fence and 2.5 kids. Even though we know that the “American Dream” isn’t real, I hypothesize that I’m living a life that looks pretty close to what Americans were promised: The promise of being able to take care of ourselves by working one job. (I’m a homeowner able to cover all of my financial needs with money left over to fund my “wants,” too).

But the reality is, the cost of childcare in the U.S. is soaring, and support for working families is plummeting. It often doesn't make financial sense for both partners in a two-parent household to work when childcare expenses eat up one entire salary. So, my lifestyle becomes a trigger, exposing the brokenness of a system that promises a dream but requires opting out of a significant part of it (the 2.5 kids part).

As a millennial raised in the era of '80s and '90s feminism, I challenge the notion that women must "have it all" – a full-time job, kids, endlessly trying to climb up the corporate ladder in a pencil skirt and sensible pumps. Choosing to be childfree is my way of practicing feminism.

Are DINKs Happier?

Are DINKs happier than parents? Outside of personal anecdotes of the idea that children bring boundless joy, studies show that happiness in parenthood varies wildly. Contrary to the belief that having children leads to greater happiness, an adult’s happiness with children is strongly tied to how much social support a country provides to a parent.

My visit in the summer of 2023 to the Happiness Museum in Copenhagen was lovely. The Happiness Museum was created by Miek Wiking and other members of The Happiness Research Institute, a think tank focusing on well-being, happiness, and quality of life (I highly recommend the Little Book of Hygge and The Art of Making Memories as great proxies for getting to the Copenhagen Museum). The mission of the Museum is “That guests will leave a little wiser, a little happier and a little more motivated to make the world a better place.” I know that when I left, I felt all of those things!

Outside of learning about how different factors influence happiness, such as hours spent working, closeness of other community members, and proximity to nature, the Museum had data on parental happiness.

In a shock to no one, countries that provide generous parental leave, childcare, and early childhood education often have parents who are happier than parents stuck trying to juggle it all themselves (Glass, 2016). At the bottom of the “parents and happiness” list? The United States. The more paid time off and childcare subsidies a country has, the more likely parents will be happier. And? It’s a win-win; in countries that support parents, it actually also supports the happiness of non-parents.

Childfree Financial Planning

Now, let's get down to the nitty-gritty of child-free financial planning. Living the DINK life comes with its own set of considerations often overlooked by traditional financial planning. Sure, you don’t have to save for a child’s higher education in a 529 plan, but you still have to think about your retirement and the wishes you have for the future once you’re gone.

Estate Planning for Childfree Individuals
Regardless of having dependents, having a will and trust is crucial. It's about specifying how a person’s estate should be managed after they gone. For me? In addition to noting which organizations will receive money when I’m gone, it also means specifying who is responsible for my pet(s) and allotting funds for them. For others, it means specifying which family members, community nonprofits or schools, or other organizations are a part of the estate plan. Another movement to check out is the “die with nothing” movement. It sounds macabre, but the idea is to donate and give to causes and people while you’re alive so you can see the fruits of your generosity while you’re on earth.

Power of Attorney For Health & FInances
In case of incapacitation, designating a power of attorney (DPOA) for both healthcare and financial decisions is vital. This is the legal way of saying, “If I’m sick, I’m letting THIS PERSON make decisions on my behalf.” Make sure you have an open and honest conversation with your Power of Attorney–it’s also helpful to have a backup person named. For example, my spouse is my DPOA, but I have a sibling named as a backup in the event that something happens to my spouse.

Disability and Life Insurance
With the possibility of leaving the workforce early due to disability, having disability insurance is a must. Childfree folks need life insurance to cover funeral expenses and provide financial stability to loved ones.

Investing for the Childfree Future
Childfree individuals need to be proactive about retirement planning. Aggressively investing in retirement accounts ensures financial security down the road. Whether through employer-sponsored plans or individual options like IRAs, it's about making the money work for their future. A childfree future often means earmarking additional monies for long-term care or modifications to be able to age-in-place.

Embracing the Childfree Movement

Whether you're a DINK, DINKWAD, or any other person in childfree category, it's time to embrace the movement. We deserve financial support and understanding just like anyone else. Let's challenge societal norms, navigate our unique financial journeys, and live our childfree lives! The increasing number of childfree individuals signifies a shift in the landscape of what life can look like, and I hope you can see how YOU fit into the movement, too!